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(a.k.a. Buffy vs. The Killer Snot Monster from Outer Space)

Written by: Rebecca Rand Kirshner
Directed by: David Solomon
Starring: Sarah Michelle Gellar as Buffy Summers
Nicholas Brendon as Xander Harris
Alyson Hannigan as Willow Rosenberg
Marc Blucas as Riley Finn
Emma Caulfield as Anya
Michelle Trachtenberg as Dawn Summers
James Marsters as Spike
Anthony Stewart Head as Rupert Giles
Guest Starring: Charlie Weber as Ben
Nick Chinlund as Major Ellis
Kevin Weisman as Dreg
Randy Thompson as Dr. Kriegel
Amber Benson as Tara Maclay
Kristine Sutherland as Joyce Summers
Co-Starring: Paul Hayes as Older Nightwatchman
Keith Allan as Skinny Mental Patient
Erin Leigh Price as Vampire Chick
April Adams as Nurse Lampkin
Barbara C. Adside as Creature
Debbie Lee Carrington as Creature

Plot Summary

Ben summoned a killer snot monster to thin out the people that Glory drove insane.

Plot Details

The episode opened in Joyce's hospital room with Dawn eating green Jell-O while discussing its origins. Dr. Kriegel came in to say that they will be able to do surgery on Joyce in a couple of days. Joyce was not looking forward to the wait.

Willow, Xander, and Giles were fighting two female vampires. An amateur might believe that the vampires were getting the best of the fight, but when it was all done, Xander, Giles, and Willow walked away (barely) while the vampires were dust, courtesy of two Willow stakings in the back. Riley was supposed to be there, but he was letting a third female vampire suck on his left arm somewhere else.

Willow brought gifts to Joyce, Buffy, and Dawn. They included a beer hat for Joyce, a book on spells for Dawn, and homework and a yo-yo for Buffy. Buffy was not happy either at giving Dawn a book on spells or getting homework. Joyce made a weird outburst, which upset the others, so they left.

On the way out, Buffy, Willow, and Dawn ran into another crazy man. This one also had words for Dawn. Ben came by and said that the mental ward was too full, so some of the patients were being sent home with their families.

Willow and Tara had a sleepover on the roof of a building. Willow commented on the stars, which made Tara realize that things were rough at the hospital. Willow pointed out traditional constellations, but Tara had a few of her own like the Big Pineapple, Short Man Looking Uncomfortable, Moose Getting a Sponge Bath, and Little Pile o' Crackers.

Tara suggested that Willow give Tara-styled names to constellations, when a meteor crashed into the ground. The crazy from the hospital was wandering near the impact site and was ambushed by what looked like a giant slug.

At the hospital, the slug wandered the ceiling while Joyce desperately pushed the call button. For some reason, Dr. Kriegel answered instead of a nurse. Joyce wanted to go home. Dr. Kriegel was reluctant to let her go, but he finally relented.

Willow, Tara, Riley, Xander, Anya, and Giles investigated the meteor. Giles noticed that it was hollow, which led them to believe that something bad came to earth inside. They followed the tracks until they found the body of the man who was ambushed. Riley noticed a foul smelling mucus inside the man's mouth. Giles suggested exploring the woods further, but even Xander preferred research. Riley stayed behind and immediately called for Graham.

At the mental ward in the hospital, a nurse put the patients to bed. She sat outside as the slug crawled on top of one of the patients and vomited clear mucus on his face. Later, the slug watched Buffy, Joyce, and Dawn as they were preparing to leave.

A black helicopter swooped down to the meteor crash site. Four men, including Graham and Major Ellis, stepped out. Riley suggested tracking the slug with Geiger counters.

In the middle of the night, Joyce wandered down to make breakfast. When Buffy asked what she was doing, Joyce said that Buffy should not eat because she was too fat, thus establishing that she was going crazy. She then turned on Dawn, which upset her.

Xander, Giles, Willow, Tara, and Anya were researching at an astronomy library. Willow found a reference to meteor anomlies back to a Queller Impact. Xander found a reference of people calling upon meteors to quell madmen. Tara realized that the man in the woods was a mental patient and wondered who summoned it.

Willow called Riley to tell him what they discovered. He already found five corpses in the mental ward. Willow worried about Joyce, but Riley said that she had been discharged. Meanwhile, Joyce was in full rant mode, which upset both Buffy and Dawn. Neither of them knew that the queller demon was immediately above Joyce.

Riley and the commandos tracked the slug in the hospital until it stopped. They realized that it went off with some patient. Riley realized that it went off with Joyce.

Meanwhile, the queller demon landed on Joyce and started to vomit mucus. Dawn came in and fought the slug off with a coat rack. It followed her out while Joyce peeled the mucus off her face. Dawn reentered Joyce's room and closed all the doors.

The slug ambushed Buffy, tumbled down the stairs, and slithered off. Buffy grabbed a knife and started to stalk around the house. She ran into Spike, who was stealing pictures of Buffy. Buffy started to confront him, when the slug attacked him. It then went for Buffy, who was able to stab it to death. Riley and his commandos then burst in, just in time to do no good whatsoever.

At the end of his shift, Ben ran into Dreg. Dreg was not happy at Ben for summoning the slug because it drew unwanted attention. Ben said that he was, as usual, cleaning up after Glory.

At the hospital, Joyce suspected that Dawn was not what she appeared to be. Buffy confirmed that she was not. However, Joyce still thought of Dawn as her daughter and wanted Buffy to protect Dawn if anything happened to Joyce. Buffy, Dawn, Riley, Giles, Xander, Anya, Willow, and Tara were in the waiting room as Joyce was wheeled to her operation.

The Good

I have to give the episode a little credit for creating a monster that was neither a humanoid or a CGI snake.

The "Killer snot monster from outer space" is one of the funniest lines of the entire show.

The Bad

This episode was rather bland.

Overall Rank: 116

Action: 5

Willow, Giles, and Xander fought two vampires during the teaser.

Dawn fought the queller demon and got it to chase her out of Joyce's room.

Buffy and Spike fought the queller demon with Buffy killing it.

Comedy: 4

Tara taught Willow her names for constellations.

Giles said "killer snot monster from outer space."

Drama: 7

Both Buffy and Dawn worried about their mother.

Romance: 0

Character Development: 3

Joyce is undergoing an operation for a brain tumor. She knows that Dawn is not what she seems, but it does not matter to her.

Buffy is very worried about her mother.

Dawn, like Buffy, is also very worried about her mother.

Importance: 5

Joyce is about to undergo an operation.

Ben has a tie to Glory and feels the need to clean up after her.

Graham is back in town, with a new team of commandos.

Most Valuable Player: Buffy

By staking two vampires, Willow put herself in the running before the opening credits. However, Buffy gets the MVP for defeating the queller demon. Dawn gets credit for fighting off the queller demon and Ben gets credit for ridding himself of a headache.

Sherlock Holmes Award: Willow

Willow was the first to say that something bad was in the meteor and slithered away. Willow and Xander both discovered important information in the astronomy wing of the library. Willow discovered slightly more information than Xander did, so she gets this award.

Goat of the Week: The Mental Ward Nurse

Not much happened in this episode, so there was not much room for failure. The mental ward nurse did allow five patients to die on her watch while she was not paying attention, so she gets the Goat.

Random Commentary

If I were much of an artist, the star pattern that makes up the background of this site would reflect Tara's constellations. Instead, I just used a random number table.

Memorable Dialogue

This girl at school told me that gelatin is made from ground-up cows' feet and that if you eat Jell-O, there's some cow out there limping with no feet, but I told her I'm sure they kill it before they take off their feet. Right?" Dawn
"You're the one who insisted on teaching her to talk." Buffy

"I feel just like Santa Claus, except thinner and younger and female and, well, Jewish." Willow

"You got her a book on spells. The girl who can break things by just looking at them now has a book to teach her to break things by looking at them?" Buffy

"I don't believe in tiny, Jewish Santa any more." Buffy

"You know what's weird?" Willow
"Japanese commercials are weird." Tara

"See those stars over there: Short Man Looking Uncomfortable, Moose Getting a Sponge Bath, Little Pile o' Crackers. That was a bit of a stretch." Tara

"I still don't get why we had to come here to get info about a killer snot monster." Xander
"Because it's a killer snot monster from outer space. I did not say that." Giles

"It would appear that the world is not being invaded." Giles
"I'm pretty pleased about that." Tara

"Dawn, she's not mine, is she?" Joyce
"No." Buffy
"She's, she does belong to us, though?" Joyce
"Yes, she does." Buffy
"And she's important to the world, precious. As precious as you are to me? Then we have to take care of her. Buffy, promise me, if anything happens, if I don't come through this..." Joyce
"Mom..." Buffy
"No, listen to me. No matter what she is, she still feels like my daughter. I have to know that you'll take care of her, that you'll keep her safe, that you'll love her like I love you." Joyce

Characters in Peril


Willow Jewish References

Spoiler Questions

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This page was last modified on November 29, 2012